My Decluttering Journey

It's been a blissful year; this month we celebrate our first year anniversary in this new home.  Happy memories of get-togethers with family and friends abound; we didn't encounter any negative vibes here, everything is just wonderful.  

Since this time also marks the start of my journey in disposing the "excesses" of "worldly possessions", I'm here to rehash and share with you how I was able to declutter. 

 I started to sort our stuff when I was packing up prior to our move to the new home.  I was over-whelmed at the enormity of the things I had to pack, I didn't realize that we accumulated so much in all these years especially the kitchen effects. 

"What do you expect?":

I asked myself, then I realized that earlier on when we were both working, we hosted lots of parties that I wanted to have "all the works".  Add the gifts I got on our silver wedding anniversary and those on birthdays and Christmases so they really added up. 

As I tried to take photos of each one that were stored under the big island and kitchen cupboards thinking to email them to my children to choose from; I saw items I didn't even remember I had; some still in gift wrap; dinner sets, all kinds of glasses and mugs, trays, bowls and platters galore!  I had two sets of punch bowls with hooks to hang the cups around; two sets of silver coffee/tea sets, cups and saucers and lots of serving paraphernalia.   

Initially, I was hoping that my children would want some of our stuff but then two of them live abroad so I realized that even if they wanted too, it's more practical for them to buy where they are.

"I just want my Tonka toys", my son said. 

So I boxed up his red tractor, the blue and white hauling truck, the yellow bulldozer and the blue dump truck. 

My younger daughter who also lives abroad indicated she wanted the big 1954 poster of the 2nd Marian Congress in the Philippines that my Papa framed in heavy narra; plus a mother-and-child pastel painting of a Filipino artist, Tagle.  Since then, she has been home thrice but she only took home a crystal vase and a set of antique silver cake server.  Nevertheless, I'll keep those two for her. 

 

My older daughter who lives in town still has her wedding presents intact in boxes after eleven years.  She only got a Pyrex loaf pan, a crystal bowl and a round serving platter.   What am I to do with the rest?  I gave my brother wine glasses and I asked a niece, whose house is being constructed and she only wanted a set of brandy glasses.  

"I'll look into your frames when my house is done, Ninang", she said. 

We had boxes and boxes of books, hard bound and paperbacks alike, magazines too.    Before the advent of the iPad, I bought at least three paperbacks a week and my husband at least one bestseller a week since he watches TV more often than I do.  I donated to a remote barrio educational books, children's books, a set of children's classics and a set of old encyclopedia for their school library.  The remaining books for reading entertainment and the magazines were marked for sale. 

I was lucky to have the luxury of time in sorting our belongings before we sold the house.   I followed the traditional three boxes for "keep", "donate" and "dispose".  It was easy to do this with my clothes.  For kitchen items and house decor, I also had three groups: "keep", "retain while I think about it" and "dispose". 

Fortunately, I operate a retail store so all the items to "dispose" ended at the store for sale. I was surprised that they went fast,  in six months most of the items were sold out including a sala set, and an office swivel chair.  We had to give away to a neighbor one sala set.  I brought the "donate" items to our parish office that took care of distributing them.

My biggest challenge was my younger daughter's stuff in her former room untouched since she went to work abroad.   In spite instructions from her, I still needed my best judgement in sorting them; it's difficult to sort things that aren't yours.  I was deludge in her mountain of clothes; fortunately  her sister knows her stuff well and that helped me decide which ones to keep.   Her albums occupied an entire row of a cabinet so I let someone detached the pictures to fit into three one-foot cube boxes. 

Although my older daughter got all her clothes when she got married, the space vacated were occupied by baby stuff of my granddaughter. Sorting this was simpler since she was there to do it, still it took us three sittings.  

Right after our move, my younger daughter sent me the Marie Kondo ebook:  "The Life-changing Magic of Tidying-up".  

To this day, I still refer to it.   She also sent me the link on becoming a minimalist.  As I continue to trim down our stuff, I still review the minimalist blogs.  When I discard a piece of clothing, a home decor or a dish nowadays, doing so gives me a good feeling that I can't quite explain, a sense of calm and serenity as well as relief are words that come close but doesn't fully describe it. 

In retrospect, I'm proud to say that my de-cluttering journey didn't  bring me difficult emotions or any mental "tag-of-war" whether to keep or discard something.  However when I sorted two shoe boxes of greeting cards I saved before the digital age , I cried and didn't have the heart to throw away any of them.  I guess it was the sentimental thoughts and loving greetings that made them so previous.  I saved them all!

Avocado-Mango-Chicken Salad Wrap

Today I got inspired by the avocado chicken salad wrap of Jen Nikolaus, a recipe blogger and photographer of yummyhealthyeasy.com.  This recipe was posted by my college BFF, Bee on Facebook which I found interesting that I wanted to try it. 

Everyday recently, I've been searching for food that is light, something  right for these hot summer days. I got the hint from my husband who mentioned recently that the Japanese has a menu for every season.   I thought that this avocado-chicken salad wrap will go well with the calamari that my granddaughter requested. 

These are the basic ingredients.

I chopped the celery, onions and grapes and sliced the avocado

Mashed avocado mixed with Greek yogurt, chopped ingredients, salt and garlic powder.  The recipe called for lime but I didn't  have that, so I used lemon.  The weather is already hot as it is so I didn't put curry powder anymore which the recipe indicated as optional.

Oops! Sorry that I missed to take a picture of the shredded chicken breast that was also added into the mix. 

 

I prepared the slices of avocado and oh yes, ripe mango; it's not in the recipe but I couldn't help adding it at the last minute. Mango definitely made the wrap more interesting and tasty. 

Mixed filling topped with slices of avocado and mango on the tortilla wrap ready to roll.

 

I sliced each roll into three.

Our lunch today. 

I found this wrap very filling, I was able to eat two slices.  

Reflections On Getting Older

"Growing old beats the alternative--- dying young"-------Regina Brent

Getting older is getting better?

Like wine, they say.  At least we get wiser with age; with experience, it is easier to learn new things and to understand human nature; we also mellow with age: we become more understanding, patient and tolerant.  But to live a full life we have to be physically independent with all our faculties intact.  Doing physical and mental exercises will prolong the inevitable. 

Almost everyone in my generation is turning 70, oh my, isn't my anxiety growing by the minute?  Every time we hear a text alert from friends, there is that apprehension that it's bad news.  Either one is very sick or had left us. 

Last Sunday we attended another 70th birthday party;  a surprise party actually that the son of the celebrant from the US had to stay in his sister's house for three days to add drama to the surprise.  Oh well, the celebrant was indeed surprised that he had tears of joy.   But I for one don't appreciate this kind of surprise, I'd rather spend the time bonding with my children. To borrow a phrase from a famous game show: A Minute to Win It,  I'd say that 

"every second counts", especially at our age. 

Nevertheless, it was a happy event and like any other 70th-and-beyond birthdays, the celebrant spoke of how lucky he is to reach this age and to celebrate this milestone with family and the dearest and closest of friends. 

Socializing keeps  people alive; for seniors who stay home a lot, meeting up with friends break the monotony of routine; that's why I was not surprised to see the big turn out of guests, there were more than a hundred.  I asked the celebrant's spouse how she gathered quite a crowd specially that she had to keep it secret from her husband and she said that some invitees were recommended by friends she invited. 

After the hellos and the how-are-you's, "how are the kids" comes next.  This is when parents would share their children's achievement and before you know it, they will be showing pictures of grandchildren on their iPhones.  But without grandchildren, you'd feel a bit inadequate and hope no one will ask.  After a long absence we find that some friends haven't changed while others are not so lucky I could hardly recognize them. Oh yes, life can be unfair sometimes. 

When we attend parties, my husband and I don't usually stick together all the time so we are able to social and catch up with as many friends as possible.  That being so, we have different stories to tell each other when we rehash  the party afterwards. 

When I texted my older daughter to let her know that we're back home safe at around 10 pm, she replied:

"Oh, you're home early"

"It's mostly a seniors' party", I replied.  

 Except for the 6 grandchildren of the celebrant and a sprinkling of younger ones, the guests went home shortly after dinner; they didn't even stay for coffee.  In fact we were among the last to leave, we lingered a bit longer catching up with a few close friends. 

As we age, we begin to understand, (though many have realized this sooner), that in the end, what only matters is the family and true friends; not our wealth nor our professional achievements.  Here's an excerpt of the famous last words of Steve Job that aptly describes this realization:

"I have reached the pinnacle of success in the business world, in others' eyes my life is the epitome of success. However, aside from work, I have little joy. There should be something more important. 

The wealth I have won, I cannot bring with me, only the memories precipitated by love.  That's the true riches that will follow you, accompany you, giving you strength to go on. 

Treasure love for your family, love for your spouse, love for your friends, cherish others."

Here's another point of reflection from a Facebook post of a dear friend Nina, who I know have so much faith:

"Bless this Sunday, our bonding time with the family.  Sometimes we feel as though life is slipping away from us, and the passage of time fill us with super anxiety.  These feelings are natural and normal, though I know that our hearts are made for eternity.  When anxious thoughts oppress us, God will always be there for us."

And I made this comment:

"The anxiety there is loud and clear and like you, I know it's but normal.  I accept that we all have to go sometime; so I try to "live each day like it is my last, and learn like I'll live forever". 

In the meantime, I'm enjoying life, like Hemingway said: 

"it's the journey that matters", so lets keep on going as long as we can.  In life however, this journey determines the destination and lest we forget, this destination is forever. 

"When In Doubt, Put Ice, says my Chiropractor

Yes, docMike's blog of the Mabuhay Chiropractic Clinic says to "ice it" when you have pain due to swelling or inflammation; never hot compress since that will enhance further swelling.

I went to the clinic again this week due to my knee pain.  I presumed my problem recurred after I was adjusted by doc Storm a year ago.  Unfortunately, he is now attending to patients in a further clinic, but fortunately,  I finally got to meet and was attended to by the clinic owner himself, Dr. Michel Yves Tetrault, who graduated summa cum laude, Doctor of chiropractic in America. He also represents the chiropractic community in Asia. 

He welcomed me with a smile and as soon as I sat, he started a preliminary talk about causes of pain and how chiropractic can help.

"Oh, I'm a believer", I said, "and that includes my family, after all, your first patient was my husband who was relieved from an excruciating neck pain; I even have a blog about my first chiropractic experience".  In fact I had also referred relatives and friends from abroad and he recalled my BFF from Las Vegas whom he attended to personally.  

To digress a bit, I greeted this BFF on Facebook on her birthday:

"Happy birthday, BEE!  it's never to late to follow your passions and chase your dreams". And she replied:

"Thanks, but you know girl, at our age, we can't just escape some aches and pains", to which I replied:

"I have no physical aches and pains, I have a great doctor, a iridologist as well as a good chiropractor.  Why don't I bring you to them when you come visit, can't let my BFF suffer", I said. 

My husband and I brought her to both clinics and after a session she had to go back home so she was referred to a chiropractor in Las Vegas to continue adjustments.

Back to my knee pain...

"I had this problem last year after a fall which caused a big swell on my left knee.  I was adjusted by doc Storm and it never bothered me again until now", I told him. 

"Let's take a look, lie on your back", he said indicating the examination table.  He tested the flexibility of my knee, bending it in all directions; surprisingly I didn't feel any pain. He then went through the motions of checking and adjusting my back, my hips and my neck.  I felt more relaxed right after I heard that mild cracking sound as pressure was applied on my back, but the loudest crackle was when he turned my neck to the left.  

"Do you favor sleeping on your left side?", 

"Yes", I replied

"Try to balance sleeping on both sides", he said.  I understood what he meant since I heard most of the crackle coming from my left side during adjustment. 

As for my knee, he found nothing serious, not even medium serious but small serious that shouldn't be ignored for there is swelling of a pulled/strained ligament.  

"There is no quick fix, just apply ice for 20 minutes twice a day for two weeks; and read my blog about knee care", he said. 

I am already feeling the relief tonight, my second day, after my forth session of ice compress.  I use an ice bag, generously filled with ice that I lodge on top of my knee like a crown so my entire knee is fully covered. 

So, should you feel pain due to swelling or inflammation, doc Mike says:  hid "the first aide rule....use ice!".

My Version of Bruschetta

Today, my eldest niece and sister-in-law came for a visit. Instead of serving just toasted bread along with sun-dried tomato pesto pasta and roast beef, I thought I'd make bruschetta.  To be honest, I love bruschetta too and I felt like eating some. 

Here's how I did it.

Wash and cut a shallow cross on the bottom of each tomato, like in the picture below:

Boil water, remove from heat and put in the tomatoes.  Let it stay for a few minutes, then remove from water. 

Notice that the peel is starting to separate, peel when it's cold enough to handle. 

Cut the tomatoes into half; and use your thumb to push out the seeds.

Chop seeded tomatoes

Drain to remove excess tomato juice. 

Mix in  several leaves of chopped fresh basil and fresh tarragon  together with the following:

1 tbsp olive oil

1 tsp balsamic vinegar

1 tsp salt

1 clove minced garlic

1/2 tsp ground pepper

Set aside, ok to put in refrigerator to chill. 

Slice fresh ciabatta into three, then cut each slice horizontally into two. 

Brush olive oil on one side and toast in oven until crunchy and brown on the edges. 

You can then spread over the tomato mixture or serve in a bowl and let guests spread the tomato mixture on their own ciabatta themselves. 

Goodbye Old House; Hello New Home!

                                      Our Old House

"It's over" , my husband said when I got home after I turned over our former home to the new owner.

"No regrets", I silently told myself.  "The house is just a shell now.  It's a blessing in disguise actually; we are in a better place".

Earlier at dawn, over coffee before my morning walk, I tried to look deep in my heart about letting go of our house of 38 years.  I knew that I'm giving up the house today. 

"How do you feel about this?"

I asked myself;  I was surprised that I had no qualms going about it.  In fact, while I was driving over to the house later, it  even occurred to me that the buyer may back out after the deal has been sealed;  that got me a bit worried there. 

Two days ago when I iMessage my younger daughter that we were about to turn over the house, she asked:

"How do you and dad feel?"

I guessed that she was a bit concerned and she wanted to know whether we still hold the same sentiments about the house; and if that was so, I assumed that she wanted to help us make things a bit easier; a little moral support maybe, like comforting words that: 

"everything will be fine, you'll see".  

She and her siblings know that we planned to stay in that house forever until circumstances made us move out. 

"After everything that happened,  and after we removed our valuable stuff; it became just a house, besides the village is too busy now so 'there's no love lost' ", I sent back. 

"I agree", she replied with a smile. 

And it's true; actually I'm also surprised that letting go was that easy.  

In the process of packing up our belongings some months ago,  I was filled with a deep sadness, I was crying, emotions and disbelief consumed me, I almost couldn't breathe.  For days, I was moving around on autopilot, often feeling sorry for myself;  I couldn't fathom why we had to move out of that house.  But I had to accept the situation, 

"My Lord", I prayed, "if this is Your will, so be it; I believe that Your plans are better than our dreams".

Eventually, we were out of the storm, able to see the rainbow, and found our way back to normal again.  Looking back, I know that it was the constant love and unconditional support of our children that got us through.  Getting settled and fixing the new home was the exact therapy that consoled us, a distraction that helped us get on with our lives.  

Today, when I turned over our former home, I thought that it would be a difficult and sad day for me; on the contrary I felt relieved.   Was looking after the house a burden especially that we now live in another place quite farther away?  Is it about leaving behind the baggage of our earlier lives?  Is it because we believe that when a door closes, another will be opened?   I think it's all of the above and more. 

When I handed over the keys, I said to the new owner: 

"Please take care of this house, it has served us well".  

And to the house I said a silent: 

"Thank you for providing a haven for our family".

I wont deny that we had been happy there regardless life's ups and downs; we have lots of great memories especially in the early days when our children were very young and most especially these last ten years.  Now that they are all grown up, having their own families, I can still keep the memories, sans the house.  

As my older daughter said:

"Mom, we can make lots of new memories in your new home."  

And I believe her.  For the last nine months, we already spent happy times here, there was my 70th birthday in July when all my children and their families were here, then last Christmas was one of the best Christmases I ever had.  So, yes!  We started making great memories again. 

We are happy in this new home, everyday after a whole morning at my store, oftentimes tired and hungry, I feel invigorated as soon as I enter the village gate; a sense of peace and serenity never fail to engulf me. 

The "icing of the cake" is our edible backyard garden.  It is something that we wanted for the longest time.  It has become our preoccupation, giving us so much joy and peace and renewed energy.  Growing old here will be great. 

Hello new home!

One Of The Best Christmases Ever!

It's a rainy new year!

It looks gloomy and sad, it seems to tell me that the season's celebration is over.

My friend in Winnipeg who greeted me "happy  holidays" commented of Facebook:

"I enjoy reading your blogs, Rita, it is good food for our snow-affected thoughts";

Just like my friend who seemed okay with snow, the rain couldn't dampen my spirit as well, not after spending one of the best Christmases I ever had.   It was really great, but I also missed my younger daughter and her husband who couldn't come home for the holidays.  Had they been here, I'd say it would have been perfect.  But really; does "perfect" ever happen in this "vale of tears"? 

The weekend before Christmas

My celebration started with breakfast on Friday.  My son, who was here on business called:

"Mom, I'm free for breakfast, would you and dad like to come join me at Shangrila near my office?"  

He knows that we rarely go to the  city's business district since we can get everything we need in the malls around here at the south of the metro. 

"That is if you only like, have a change of scene.", my son continued. 

I looked at my husband who can hear the conversation on speaker phone and he nodded.

"Of course, we'd love too, and your sister here is free to join us", I replied. 

"And I won't go back home anymore, I'll wait for my family to join me here on Sunday night,  I'll spend the weekend with you until they get here", he said further.

We then had a sumptuous breakfast at Circles, one of Shangrila's restaurants.  But what I enjoyed more was catching up with our son and listening to him and our older daughter sparring jokes like they used to when they were younger. When my children get together and talk about things of days gone by,  I'm besieged with hundreds of long-ago memories that I always treasure.

Like most hotels, Shangrila had their lobby all dressed up for the holidays so we took pictures while waiting for my son to join us. 

We spent the whole weekend with our son, just talking, eating, reading and whatever we felt like doing.  Luckily, our older daughter was free to join us in most of our meals.  It rained the whole weekend but we enjoyed it nonetheless.  

 I asked what he wanted to eat, I know he is tired of hotel and airplane food,  he travels the world often and fly from one Asia-Pacific city to another almost week after week.  My husband and I gladly prepared the food he said he misses most. 

I know he is a very busy person and I wanted to know how he is coping. 

"Don't you ever get tired flying and getting bored as you wait for your flights?", I asked.

"No", he said, "I'm at the lounge doing my work".

"What?", I asked myself, "doesn't he ever stop working?"

We also had fun deciding what food to prepare for Christmas Eve;  we wanted something light since we have been eating much that weekend.  Besides, we do not believe in having a Christmas table over-flowing with food. 

"We must have a theme so it's easy to come up with a menu", my son said. 

We couldn't have lechon (roast pig), nor broiled tuna nor crabs; we already had those earlier. 

Definitely Filipino food was out.  Japanese food was an option but it was over-ruled.  We considered what my daughter-in-law likes since she is just about to join us.  We know that she loves Mexican food.  Everyone love tacos, so we had soft wrap and crunchy shells and corn chips.  We also dipped hard roll on callos and gambas  and included baked mussels and of course, the traditional Chinese ham and queso de bola.   Paella was too heavy, we decided to do that another day. 

What do most people say when things are great?   Ahh,

"if this is a dream, I hope I'll never wake up".  So if I was dreaming, I was glad nobody told me for I didn't want to wake up.  

........and time really flies when you're having fun... who knows when this will happen again?

My grandchildren 

When my grandson arrived, we were ready for him. We brought out toys my granddaughter had when she was younger.  My grandson latched on the toy car immediately even though it seemed too small for him; he has bigger rides back home, but I'm glad he liked it just the same.

Give children Lego and you'll never go wrong

Small cars to push seem interesting to them as well. 

Our grandson who is 20 months old recently joined a toddler class back home, having attended only five days so far, he is learning to interact with others, something he is not used to, being an only child.   He is reluctant to be carried by others.  But like the day we last saw him in November when we visited; he finally let me carry him to the car so these  pictures were possible. 

My granddaughter is alone as well but has always looked forward to bond with her cousin every chance she had.   Below are some pictures of them doing that familiar kindergarten song:

"My toes.......

......my knees.....

..my shoulders, my head".

And "high five", too.

I couldn't ask for anything better this Christmas; a well-spent holiday season, and I know I wasn't dreaming for I have all the pictures in my Dropbox and stored all the wonderful times in my memory playlist. 

 

What about you, did you have an amazing Christmas as well?  If you are in your golden years you'd appreciate Christmas like the way I've had; no glitter of tinsel nor nicely wrapped gifts nor the colorful fireworks on New Year's Eve  could compare. 

Happy new year!