As It Was In The Beginning......

A childhood friend who also lives in the same village as ours brought her cousin from the US for a visit. She knew that I'll enjoy visiting with her because we haven't seen each other since high school.  As they entered the front door this friend from the US said: " I just love your house, can you show me around?"  As I showed the rooms, my village friend said: " so no one stays in these rooms anymore now that your kids are grown, you're now an empty nest like us".  " Thats right", I said since my youngest who wasn't married then also works abroad. 

" Empty Nest"?   This does not sound good to me, it means nothing is left, right? As in abandoned!   Does it also mean that no life is left, and nothing ever happens anymore, nothing to look forward to?  Am I just being melodramatic?

"As-it-was-in-the-beginning ", sounds better to me, like it was before when there were just the two of us.

When our children left home to work abroad and/or got married, it was not easy, it took us quite awhile to get used to it.  Of course they are missed, a lot!  Really!  Some days are lonely and the next visit seem too far off.  But then that is how it should be,  isn't it.  They couldn't be staying with dad and mom, forever, right?  

Many couples sell their house when their children leave home. They often choose a smaller one, a place more manageable, something that wouldn't seem so empty.  My husband and I  earlier planned to put up a second floor on our house for more living space but somehow we never got on to it. Now we are relieved that we didn't do it at all. 

As we reached this season of our lives, we realized that it also has it's plusses.  For one, we own our time so much more, we can sleep late, wake up late with no worries that we have to prepare breakfast for anyone. When we decide to go somewhere on impulse we can be on our way in a minute. When we feel like going out meeting friends, we don't feel guilty that someone will have dinner alone.  When we travel, we don't worry that someone is left behind. 

 But the most rewarding part of it all is grand parenting. Luckily for us, our daughter who has a child lives in town, so we are very much a part of our granddaughter's life. When seniors get together, the major topic is grandchildren . If you don't have any, you feel self-conscious, deprived, left out even..A friend who enjoyed grand parenting so much once said:  " had I known that grandchildren are so much fun, I would have opted to have them first before my own children".  Hahaha!  Now, is that even logical? 

For us, parenting at this phase in our lives doesn't mean that we don't worry about our children anymore. They maybe out of sight but they are never out of our minds.  We are always in touch even though they are all grown up and had left home. Thanks to modern technology, we can talk to them anytime, wherever they are anywhere in the world. FaceTime and Skype allow us to catch up on each other's activities on a regular basis. When they go on business trips, we pray and keep our fingers crossed that they travel safe.  When there is opportunity for promotion at work,  we pray that they get the job.   Their concerns are still as much ours; we support their endeavors and we celebrate their triumphs. 

I guess parenting never ends, oftentimes we have to rearrange our formulas and assumptions,  and we need  to thread with caution;  we leave them alone to live their lives but we are there anyway when they need us. Most of the time we need to let go but never totally letting go.