SO THIS IS HOW IT FEELS TO BE 75!

Yes, I'll be turning 75 next month!  I am forever grateful for the privilege to live this long. I feel so blessed; it's truly a gift beyond belief!

But where did the years go? 

Was it only yesterday when I got married and embarked on a new life?  Thereafter, I rocked my first born son to sleep amidst tropical storms in Legaspi, Albay and on bright sunny days looking through the window at the magnificent perfect cone, the Mayon volcano.    

A few years onwards, I recall walking and holding my two  little girls (3 and 7 years old) on both hands while they skipped in front of Greenhills theatre every time we go to the shopping center. 

You'd think that 75 years, three quarters of a century is really a long time but I feel like it passed like a breeze.  I thought it would take a vey long time before I reach this age, yet before I knew it, I'm here. 

During my youth, when I was young and vibrant in high school and then college,  oftentimes I was overwhelmed with my hopes and dreams, I was determined to be successful, very confident, optimistic and in a hurry to face the world.  

But I soon realized that success is relative and sometimes people's lives unfold in the most unusual ways.  There were crossroads where I made choices and yes,  sometimes I can't help thinking of the "what if's"; wondering if I had chosen this or if I did that, had my life turned out differently?   But there's no point now to play the what-if game, after all I couldn't change the past or any of the million choices I made because in life there is no reset. 

They say that to succeed, we must aim high and dream big; aspire for the moon and if we're not lucky enough at least we'll land on a star.  But what would life be having landed on a star? 

Sometimes I wonder whether my dreams and aspirations were not all that big and my goal not high enough that I did not amass enormous wealth and I did not become famous.  Maybe my choices were conservative and they were not about wealth nor fame.  

I believe that my choices unconsciously led me to the lifestyle  I truly like; a simple uncomplicated life with a great and loving family.  "Simple" as in comfortable and to enjoy the "good life" along with the finer things in life.   But I believe in prudence regards our resources because we can't say how long we shall live and what health issues will befall us. 

So here I am, in "the winter of my life".  I see an older person in me now, and it surprises me because I see a great change.   My age is really beginning to show, not like the look I remember when I was younger.  But I feel better when I see others my age who look much older, hahaha! 

What is disheartening though is to hear that a friend is sick or worse, if he left us.  What do we expect, this is the stage in life when folks usually succumb to illness, the time that my brother-in-law humorously calls the "departure area".  Every time there's an alert on my husband's iPhone, we often hold our breath hoping it's not bad news.  And if it is, it is a warning to refrain from food detrimental to our health.  Well, I guess this is inevitable at our age. 

I learned that we must accept the reality of physical aging, we must be prepared for the aches and pains that occur occasionally; but I myself just let them be unless they persist for days and that's the only time to see the doctor.  

Nowadays I receive lots of messages and videos to  remedy those pains; exercises using the fingers and the palms; pressing a part of a foot here and there, rubbing this and that. But I believe in the mantra: "mind over matter, if you don't mind, it doesn't matter". 

So this is aging; coping and hoping that everything will be great forever.  When I turned 60, and I became a grandmother, I wanted to be there for the grandchildren as long as possible.  I started praying that I be blessed with physical independence and a lucid mind until the end.  And I pledged to do my part to take better care of myself to attain that goal.  

So I don't let up on exercise, most days I complete 10,000 steps which my pedometer gauges as 5 + kilometers.  On not so good days, I make over 8000, and my husband tells me not to force it.  I try to eat heathy, but sometimes I tell myself that  it won't hurt to indulge sometimes, "we only live once". 

There are still a lot of things I want to do, but for some reason maybe I missed the chance when I was younger and stronger.  Doing simple things are no longer as easy as they were before.  While I used to squat or bend to remove unwanted weeds in my garden earlier, well, I can still do that now with great effort, but that doesn't stop me from tending my garden.  

 

I am grateful to live in this so called the "luckiest generation",  the special edition,  because we experienced the "before" and live in the "after" of the greatest technological leap ever in this century. 

There is this  "golden memories"  (author unknown)  going around in the internet comparing what was then and now; it says that then we heard the click, clack of the typewriter, now our fingers are gracing the laptop keyboard.  Earlier, we depended on the telegraph and the postman to bring news from people important to us, now we enjoy FaceTime, zoom, what's up, etc..  

Then we were careful in taking pictures that takes so long to develop and accepted the turn out;  now we delete what's not good and even make the good ones better with photoshop; we used to record songs from the radio, now we download them on our gadgets. 

And so my life goes on.......enjoying a mellow lifestyle.  I love being a grandmother that I treasure every moment I can be with them.  I'm not that old yet so I am able to do a lot of gardening, cooking, reading, rearranging the furniture around the house, crocheting, exercising and blogging.  Contrary to what seems logical, I am amazed that I feel more focused now and my concentration is even better in spite life's distractions in this age and time. 

Now, let me end this with a line from a song dedicated to the retirees club going around in messenger: 

 

"In my heart I'll stay forever young". 

I FOUND A FRIEND DURING THE PANDEMIC

It's been 3 days since my new friend was able to join her son and Dutch husband in Rotterdam after her earlier flights were cancelled 3 times since April. 

From the airport waiting for her flight, she messaged me: 

"Thank you so very much for our wonderful mornings ! Those mornings were the highlights of my day! In my very long zoom meetings, I did not have time anymore to write you a card! But my driver will bring the wine! My thank you wine!"

I never enjoyed walking 10,000 steps more than I did with Tess.  Sans a walking buddy, I could only make more than 8000.  It is truly more pleasurable to have an exercise buddy.  Now I understand how she felt when she told me that after her move to this village she did not jog for a year, she missed her friend from her old place; she then prayed that she be given another. 

One of the best things that happened to me in this pandemic was getting to know our neighbors better.  We have this chat group that kept us updated with news and provided interaction for common concerns. It is truly a small community. 

But Tess stood out because we have a common hobby, I walk while she jogs and walks too.  We discovered a lot of common interests; cooking, gardening and so much more. We shared our best recipes, sometimes she would send me a dish peculiar to Samar, that's in southern Philippines where most of their cooking repertoire has coconut milk.

I offered my cabbage diet soup recipe when she wanted to lose 5 kilos. Don't get me wrong, she is not at all big, in fact her figure is perfect; It's just that the fridge was so accessible during this pandemic. The diet was for a week, everyday we did a countdown of her weight until, hooray!  She reached her goal. 

Then I introduced her to sun gazing, my husband's best ever, tried and tested healing therapy.  By looking directly at the sun an hour after sunrise, the eyes absorb its energy.  It is believed to energize and rejuvenate the body organs and turns one's vision to high definition.  To say that she was hooked is saying it mildly because she also sun gazed at sunset. 

Tess taught me to take better pictures, especially of sunrises and sunsets. Would you believe that to include a branch of a palm or a twig of flowers into the scene would create more interesting pictures; be it the sun, the moon or the clouds, making it a true piece of art?  Never in my life that I appreciated sunrises and sunsets more than now.  

"In pictures, perspective is important", she said.  When she gave me a bowl of huge native plums (duhat) almost as big as a teaspoon, I was at loss how to show it's size in a photo.  She put 3 pieces on her palm that hardly held them; then on a saucer with a fork.  Well, it's never to late to learn, great lesson, Tess. 

We took lots of pictures of spectacular and glorious sunrises; but what we love most is a cool and cloudless sunrise.  From her balcony, she took flaming gorgeous sunsets while I did the same in my front lawn.  At dawn,  we captured splendid pictures of a mellowed moon.  We photographed beautiful vibrant flowers, unusual plants and trees; birds in forest-like vacant lots full of multi-colored leaves. 

Her colorful home changed my mind about flowering plants, particularly bougainvilleas which I learned could be tamed, contrary to my impression that this plant is unruly and wild.  Now I'm propagating bougainvilleas from cuttings. 

We picked up fallen santol and mangoes.  Though she has a very prolific mango tree, she wanted to taste the different varieties found in the enclave. We decided her mangoes were the sweetest. 

She is a fashionista, she loves clothes, she likes to dress up in colorful exercise outfits, even her mask and cap, a match. She would tell me she saw a new mask on line that she liked so she ordered several. 

I was fascinated when we were walking one day and I started to quote Elizabeth Barrett Browning: " I love you from the depth and breadth...."  and she completed it for me.  Then she quoted Ralph Waldo Emerson: " If eyes were made for seeing .......And together, we recited: " then beauty is its own excuse for being".  Isn't that amazing? 

I enjoyed her stories, about her childhood by the beach, of magnificent sunsets and the wonderful sound of waves.  Apparently, I'm a little bit hot myself because she enjoyed my stories too.  We laughed a lot, about little things and simple things.  Once she told me that she likes our topics of conversation because there's no gossip.

Thanks for walking with me this summer, Tess.  You're such interesting company. I enjoyed our walks, the stories and the brilliant sunrises.  Many thanks too for the twin Beringer red merlot.