7 TIPS TO ENJOY SOCIAL MEDIA WITHOUT NEED TO DETOX

Many blogs and  books have  been written about the negative impact of social media.  They believe that it is often necessary to detox.

But I believe otherwise.  If we maintain a stable and disciplined mindset, we don’t need such detox.  This is what  I do to enjoy social media. 

1- 

Choose only one platform; I chose Facebook and maintain just that.  In so doing, we don’t spend time scrolling from one platform to the other. 

2- 

Keep only a reasonable number of friends; those who are really great friends that you know personally and proved to be good for you; those that you totally trust; those who cheer along during your triumphs and pull you up when you’re down.  It  is always good to catch up with them  if getting together is not possible.  That way you can still connect..

3- 

Avoid joining groups if they are not useful to you and  if there is nothing to be learned from seeing their posts.  Definitely keep a group of your clan/family if there is one.  Consider also a group within the community to keep you updated on common concerns.  

Sometime ago, my sister included me in a cooking community.  While it was great to learn cooking skills from professional chefs, keeping up with postings to match their’s is tiresome.  I coped but it consumed a lot of my time. 

Moreover, there were so many  people in the group that  I don’t know personally.   I became wary that they could access my posts  and other personal details.  I left the group. 

A close friend invited me to join a home-and-garden group.  Initially, I was just looking at their posts.  I didn’t even feel posting anything of my garden or home because most of their  posts  are magazine worthy.  Not that I’m not proud of my garden which is quite unique to my taste but may look mediocre to others.  I left the group. 

4- 

Avoid posting every detail of  your life.   For your safety, avoid posting personal details; refrain posting your every move and activity; your schedule and where you are going.

5- 

Do not feel obliged to post something everyday; and only when you have a post-worthy item to share.  Keep in mind that it is futile to greet your partner happy birthday or anniversary if he doesn’t have a Facebook account. 

6- 

Keep a mindset not to compare yourself with others.  Always feel grateful and happy for who you are and what you have.  If not, this is when feelings of insecurity and anxiety start. 

You will see posts that will make you insecure, envious, jealous and feel left out.  Just remember that you only see that fraction of their lives.  Know that at every point, no one is excepted from coping with a difficult life.   So take hold of yourself; don’t let them affect you in a bad way . 

Understand these scenarios that may possibly affect you. 

—You  see posts of a family always eating in high end restaurants and you ask yourself when was the last time you dined there? 

What you don’t know is that maybe the  family is living beyond their means; their credit card is always in the red and are worried how to pay next month’s bill. 

—You see a wife often post Michelin-star-quality meals.   In reality, her husband expects that for dinner everyday.  She feels it’s drudgery and is often tired.

—Someone keeps posting fabulous parties she attends, all  dressed up in glamorous gowns.   Then you say: I wish I can go to such parties too and you feel left out.  What you don’t know is that she hates parties but for one reason or another she needed to go; but she’d rather relax at home with a good book. 

7- 

Establish a time to open your social media account and stick to that.  Discipline yourself so as  not to interfere with your work schedule or doing housework.  Remember that everything excessive is not good, so let’s not overdo social media.  

I’ve been on Facebook for more than a decade and I never felt needing a detox.  In fact, I look forward to the time I’ve set to scroll my newsfeed. 

I’ve reconnected with town mates; with relatives and friends who now live abroad.  We enjoy relieving interesting memories of the past and sharing how we are coming along. 

Everything is great, no need for detox. 

STEPPING BACK FROM THE WHIRLDWIND OF LIFE

The pandemic turned our lives to slow living.  

No going out except for necessities.  No dining out, no parties, no chilling at cafes, no strolling in malls and no travel.  No spa as well and no mani-pedi in saloons; not even for a trim.  In other words; just stay home. 

What is slow living?

It is a life approach where we elevate the quality of life by slowing down daily activities to give way doing more important things.  

It is creating a good balance in all aspects of our lives.   

It is also a lovely change of pace when we realize that we have been doing so many things, get so overwhelmed yet find something is missing.  

It doesn’t mean we have to do things slowly, like taking too long to make tea. 

Some say : declutter, be a minimalist if you wish ; cook simple meals, turn off the noise; minimize  social media time.  

Someone said:  “stepping back from the whirlwind of life”.

I am one person who do things fast; I walk fast and eat fast.  Slow living taught me to slow down, spend time and energy only for what’s important. To savor my food; enjoy every moment and never to be rushed or frazzled with what I need to do.  

I learned to take time to appreciate that I’m really alive and found that I want to spend time laughing, loving and living fully engaged on what matters most.

Looking back to the times my son and his family visit; he will always nag me: 

“Mom, sit down already.  We came here primarily to bond with you while we eat”.  

I have the habit of calling them to the table while I finish last-minute fixings   Now I realized that I often missed out on the fun and conversations.

I’ve learned to do things one at a time within a calculated time frame; no more multi-tasking because it causes stress.  I cook simple meals if I can; if not my husband understands and suggests takeout.  My husband and I found a rhythm in going about our chores and hobbies.  I keep our home clean and orderly but if I can’t vacuum today, that’s okay, I can do that tomorrow.

Slow living gave me time to think about my life and I’m glad that I never compare my lifestyle with others.   I am grateful for what I have.  Keeping up with the Joneses or in this modern day we say; keeping  up with the Kardashians will only cause frustrations which in the long term doesn’t matter at all.  I am happy with my own unique life.  

I realized that it is easier to accept life’s imperfections, I do not worry or overthink because life doesn’t always turn out the way we want to; sometimes they turn out better; even beyond our wildest expectations.

I think I am liking the feeling of slow living, so much so that after the pandemic, I will keep this lifestyle.  It feels liberating, it makes me breathe easier and makes life really simple.  

One great thing in slow living is I can stay right here at home, no need to go and live in the countryside, in “the little house on the prairie”.

But when the pandemic is over, I’ll still dine out with family, meet up with friends, checkout the malls, go have mani-pedi and travel to visit our children abroad. 

My garden, my sanctuary. 

WILL IT BE PINK?

Yesterday someone  wrote  that 

“Social Media Tickled Pink by Robredo’s Decision “ to run for 2022 elections.

I was already in bed, about to sleep last night when I heard my Viber notification.  I was tempted to ignore it but it maybe my daughter. So I opened my iPad. 

Lo and behold!  I saw three pictures of buildings all lit up in pink sent by my comadre. One of DLSU, Ayala mall, Cebu and St Luke’s Medical Center.  

I became curious so I opened Facebook since my daughter mentioned earlier that “ #VP LENI” was all over social media.  I was surprised to see a lot of pink indeed!   Some of my friends even changed their profile pictures with pink circles, others made their own kind of pink pictures.  

One of my closest friends, Tess also changed her profile picture showing  her at Rotterdam; wearing pink with a field of blooming pink tulips in the background

Election fever is really here in spite the pandemic.  Excitement will escalate until Election Day. 

My great memories of elections is like a fiesta. Early on Election Day, people rush to the polls then they gather outside their homes like the are celebrating. 

During my grade school days I tag along with my aunts who were teachers as they perform their election duties. I always anticipate snack time when candidates distribute packed pancit and  puto (dry noodles and native rice cake) in brown paper bags; styrofoam still non existent then. 

But elections were quite different then;  there were only Nationalita and Liberal parties.  Because of that, everyone in town can identify the leaning of every family. 

Was that better then?  Which one is more exciting, and better yet, which one favors the majority?

                           

CERTAINLY NOT FEELING 76

Another year; another birthday and the pandemic is still raging.  As the months moved from year 2020 to 2021, I’d hoped that we will eventually conquer Covid 19;  instead we are now faced with more deadly variants delta and lamda. 

It’s a bit sad to celebrate without family but  I know that I’m not the only one here; all of us are in the same boat.  Last year, my 75th, a milestone;  would have been a great opportunity to party and bond with family. 

I don’t mind staying at home and not dining out.  It’s just that at my age I feel short-changed missing out on opportunities to enjoy life with my family. 

 

But I do understand that’s why I am adopting this mantra:

 “SOON”.  

This week, I sent my younger daughter my Facebook best-of-the-year picture by the gigantic waterfalls at the Singapore Jewel in the latter part of 2019 with a caption: “HAPPY TIMES”.  She replied: “SOON”. 

Yes!  I think that is a hopeful catchword for looking forward and moving on. 

I am an optimistic person; a bright-sider too; with a  glass-half-full attitude and always a full  believer of goods things to come.   Yet, lately I’ve been thinking about the brevity of life. 

Someone said that each and everyone of us has our number of heart beats set and encrypted in our hearts from birth.  How I wish I know how many more heart beats I have left so I can plan ahead. 

Since there’s no way to know that, I’ll not waste precious time by fretting and sulking.  Once again, my friend  Nina’s idea as expressed in one of her facebook posts uplifts my perspective. 

“From here on I’ll start to enjoy life more, without missing it\"s lessons...

I’ll savor the moments, before they become memories.  

I’ll always remember that life is beautiful beyond measure...even when sometimes 

life never turns the way I want...

I will live it in the best way I can...for after all there is no perfect life; but I can fill it with perfect moments”..

And may I add; that while I still have time; I’ll say thanks if I must; apologize if I should and definitely forgive. 

I’ll expect the unexpected; and I’ll  be prepared to deal with whatever comes my way specially when the unexpected is better than what I could ever dream of. 

Should the unexpected be bad news, I’ll accept the pressures, tensions and stresses  with resignation knowing that they are inevitable parts of life.  I know such things too shall pass. 

And I will weave in joy and the joie de vivre of life in my remaining days,  thats for sure.  

THE AUTHENTIC ADOBO

The  Phillipine Department of Trade and Industry  DTI, has announced their initiative to standardize the technique in cooking a few of our popular local dishes like the adobo, sinigang, sisig and even lechon. 

My friend Tess, a great culinary affecionado wondered when she learned about it.  She post this initiative on our chat group.  My offhand reaction was : “why? Just like beauty being in the eyes of the beholder, food is in the taste buds of the eater.” 

On the flip side, another friend and neighbor, Mely says it is good so we won’t depart from the original recipe our grandmothers taught us.  “We are losing the authetic recipies”, she says further: “for  instance, when we say kare kare, surely we mean oxtail and tripe.  But nowadays some are making veggie kare kare, some use shrimp or chicken”.  She has a point here. 

The DTI  announced that their aim is to come up with a cooking technique and tag it as the authentic Philippine adobo.  Since the recipe varies in every region and in every household;  anything done differently is a variation. 

Every household has their way of cooking traditional dishes;  not only here in the Philippines but the world over.  Take the Spanish paella, a specialty dish  often cooked at home; did you know that the authentic one doesn’t use chorizo?  Yet here we can’t seem to make paella without it like it is a major ingredient. 

What happened to the all Anerican hamburger?  The original consists only of the meat putty with mustard and slices of cheddar inside a  bun.  Slices of onions, lettuce and tomato were then considered optional.   Nowadays however, they come ridiculously  tall, one could no longer hold it up to bite due to a lot of trimmings. The more trimmings seems more interesting and yummy. 

With the passing of time, variantions often evolve in a recipe. Sometimes people want change;  sometimes it depends on the availability of the ingredients or what a household can afford. 

I’m not a professional chef but I love to cook  and bake.  Baking cakes I learned from my Mama and Feista dishes like caldereta, asado, embotido, mechado, menudo, etc., I learned from my mother-in-law just the way my husband likes them. 

This is  my triple-cook adobo technique which may be considered a variation but I believe to be authentic: 

Pork cubes are first browned in little oil to keep their juices intact.  Add cooking wine, garlic, banana blossoms, cinammon bark, star anise, pepper corns and bay leaves.  

In recent years I added chopped fresh oregano and pandan leaf to enhance the taste and vanish the gamey flavor of pork. 

When pork cubes browned a bit, add in  the vinegar, soy sauce and some  water.  Simmer until pork is tender. 

In another skillet, heat oil and fry the drained pork cubes until they brown some more and release most of the fat resulting  to a better color and are crispy on the edges.   See how the finished product look like  in the photo.  The remaining juice from the skillet  maybe thickened with cornstartch  for gravy.  Though some of us  like the adobo with a little soup to top over rice. 

FINALLY GOT THAT ELUSIVE COVID-19 VACCINE

Feeling so blessed today!  Jim and I got our first jab of Pfizer COVID-19 vaccine today. So happy I feel like crying! 

The opening prayer at the vaccination center was so touching that I must have shed a tear or two.  Maybe I was full of emotion that I only remember this: “we are not doing this only for ourselves but for others, especially our families. 

We have registered with our LGU  (local goverment unit) 4 times on line  and submitted and accomplished registration forms twice.  We were also assigned Registration ID numbers. Yet we were never called for our vaccination date. 

I was already  feeling left out when most of  my walking  buddies and neighbors got their first dose.  We didn’t want to just  walk in; most often, walk-in’s were not entertained.  Besides we didn’t want to go without an appointment lest we won’t be entertained and be exposed to a crowd in an enclosed area. 

Tired of waiting, today, we decided to walk in.  We were determined to be vaccinated with any brand of vaccine Thanks to The Lord, we were given our preferred vaccine. Truly, everything is done  in God’s own time. 

Excited, I messaged my children and they were all happy for us.  My son replied: 
“Congratulations! Will say a thanksgiving prayer”. 
“So happy, I feel like crying”, I texted back. 
“I felt the same when we got it”, he texted back.  We aren’t cry babies but we take our health very seriously, hence the emotion. 

My son, the eldest and also abroad bought us Vaccines with an affiliate private company in town but they prioritized their   employees.  We had to wait for the next batch due in September.  In spite that, my son urged us to take the first vaccine available. 

Our younger daughter, also abroad, was happy for the good news and cautioned us to be more careful as ever due to the Delta variants that are highly contagious.   “It is still a long way to go but at least there is progress’”, she said. 

Our older daughter in town was the one who really pushed us to walk-in today.  She has been looking for ways to accelerate our chance for vaccination.  Now she tells me to apply cold compress.  That’s how our children take care of us, each his on way. 

The waiting and the stressful effort to register has paid off. 

“They also serve those who also stand and wait”. 


Sent from my iPhone

FATHER’S DAY, BIRTHDAYS AND MILESTONE CELEBRATIONS, PANDEMIC TIME

Today, we celebrate Father’s day with just us, my husband and I.  Like any special event during this pandemic, we couldn’t gather family and friends for a more elaborate celebration. 

But there are ways to go about not being together. This year I wrote letters to my grandchildren and my daughters. Food and gifts can still be delivered. Video calls are also great ways to greet everyone. 

Our older daughter in town sent her gift of great foodies; all of which are her Dad’s favorite; along with pasta in truffle oil, she prepared herself.  I believes it is a great substitute for a lunch treat she usually gives on such occasions.  Not to be outdone, our children abroad sent heartfelt messages and video-called. 

I believe half of our Philippine population celebrated milestones and birthdays at home twice already during  this pandemic because family members in town can’t even join in for a meal. Many are surely disappointed that they couldn’t have a party. 

My daughter’s in-laws started the tradition of sending over food to each family member: to brothers and sisters families on birthdays as a treat.  So this practice of sending over food in lieu of inviting them over is not new to them.  

So really, we have no choice.  While dining out is already allowed, many, like us are still reluctant to dine our; a way of playing it safe. What’s the rush anyway?  After all we can have food delivered to our doorstep. 

My older daughter sent her sister in Singapore tiramisu for her birthday last week. She secretly requested her sister’s husband to order the cake for her. 

So, today, Father’s Day, who  else will make it a very special day for my husband but me.  I have to step up my lunch menu.  I hope he will love it. 

To conclude; I am again Inspire as always by my friend Nina’s post today, let me quote it in part:

“Today we give much love and gratitude to all fathers as we celebrate Father’s Day. We thank Father God for the unconditional love giving His only Son, Jesus to redeem us.  May His love be perfected in us as we show His love to others and open our hearts to give kindness. “