A Positive Mindset Conquers Aging

Another year is almost upon us and next year we will all be one year older.  I'll be honest that sometimes I do hesitate to even acknowledge, much more to accept it.  On second thought, why not?  Bring it on!

If you have been reading my blogs maybe you'd wonder where all that positivity is coming from.   Do I have issues about getting older?   Is it true that being older is really better?  

I must admit that getting older is a hard task, it can be daunting and over-whelming at times; it feels like navigating in unknown territory by myself.  I just refuse to dwell on the downside because it would be futile.  However it helps that books and blogs spell out what others are going through. 

But here's the reality, let me tell you some common issues of women over 60 including my two-cents worth experience.

Old people are scorned by society.

Some old folks feel that they are not treated like productive members of society anymore, just an extra baggage with no use whatsoever, oftentimes a burden.  Many experience difficulty blending in and making new friends. 

Keeping a good figure is impossible.

No matter how we exercise and diet, our hips and tummy  expand and nothing stay firm anymore, almost everything are going down.  Get the picture?

No more stilettos!

I recall the last time I wore one was at my older daughter's wedding twelve years ago.   Early this year, I bought not an stiletto but a 2 1/2-inch-thick-heeled-non-skid shoes for a party.  Conscious that I will be off-balanced and stumble, I practiced wearing them to church the Sunday before.  Jim noticed and he even teased me.  I couldn't  look anywhere except where I was going, I had to look down every step of the way so I wouldn't fall and get a fracture.  

Old people are forgetful and tired of making lists. 

Ever heard the classic anecdote about grandma looking for her glasses everywhere until someone tells her that she's wearing them?  

And have you ever experienced going up to your room to get something but when you got there you forgot what you were supposed to get?   You go down again to recall what triggered you to get that something and you remember. 

My son reminded me early on that a short pencil is better than a long memory;  going to the mall we need a list so we won't miss anything, the same is true at the grocery and the Home Depot.   When we travel we list down what to bring.  This list-making goes on forever. 

Last week when Jim went to the mall for two things plus the one I asked him to  get for me.  He knew he had to get three items but he couldn't recall the third so he came back without my request. He forgot to make a list!

Time is running out

We seniors are conscious of time, making the most of everyday is urgent.  Twenty-four hours seem so short that we are urged to do things immediately, there are other things to do tomorrow.  

I feel that there is not enough time to bond with my children and grandchildren; I can only make the most of every possible opportunity.

Health and financial issues

You may not know it but a lot of old folks have health and financial issues, either one of those is a difficult situation to be in.  What's worst is when we are experiencing both. 

I feel blessed that those are not my concerns at the present time, still Jim and I feel that we have to be prudent in using our resources.  While we still earn an income, we don't want to touch our egg nest.  We want to be financially independent through life even though our children are generous.  For now we could only thank them but at least we feel secure that we can holler if we need help. 

Though we have to acknowledge and learn to deal with the difficult issues of aging, a positive attitude is the best way to cope.  The Sixty and Me blogs of women advocate every positive mindset about aging. 

Here are the positive things that allay my doubts about the present and the future. 

The world is ours!

We can do anything we want, we can travel without feeling guilty leaving someone at home.  We have time to explore and indulge in our passions, to remodel/renovate our home to better suit our needs, to cultivate Mother Earth and produce our own food and so much more. 

The joy of grand-parenting

One of the greatest blessings in life is having grandchildren. What joy they bring to our lives.  When our first grandchild, our granddaughter was a few months old, we looked forward three times a week when get her to spent the day with us and they were just pure joy. 

When we first visited our grandson abroad, I almost didn't want to sleep.  I stayed until the small hours of the morning feeding, cradling and watching him sleep, doing just that felt so good. 

Reunions

Getting together with old friends and former classmates is a big deal.  Many of us travel across oceans just to attend a homecoming.  

It's always great to catch up and know how and what they are doing.  Conversations are less about fashion and corporate life but more focused on family, especially grandchildren.  Who doesn't have a grandchild's picture on his iPhone?  Grandchildren is a big part of everyone's Facebook posts. 

Accept the inevitable.

We can never get back our youthful vim, vigor and vitality.  We are aware that our energy will gradually deteriorate but we can prolong this with proper diet and exercise. 

More wrinkles will appear not only on the face but all over; our hair will become gray and even fall.  It's a good thing I found olive shampoo that makes my hair grow while others' hair is thinning and falling. 

The fight is over!

As we age, we realize that fighting aging is a losing battle, we still prim ourselves so we look good but not to impress others, only to feel good about ourselves. Who cares about what others think about our looks anyway?

Be a mentor

One of the blogs @Sixtyandme.com, suggests that old folks should mentor someone, a way to put to good use our accumulated life experience and wisdom.  This should make us feel great. 

Old age makes us more tolerant and understanding. 

When we were younger some of us have no patience towards others to a point of being critical or even angry.  Now we can parallel situations with our own challenging life experiences. 

Earlier on what often looked like a hassle seem an easy task nowadays because we now have the time.   We couldn't be bothered earlier because we had more important things to do.

Aging makes us more sensitive and compassionate 

Maybe the sensitivity and the compassion was there all along, but we were often rushing, oblivious to the people around us.  Now we have all the time to see the plight of others. 

After all has been said and done, I feel it fitting to share an inspirational post of my friend Nina on Facebook yesterday.  It is truly an enlightenment that made me more optimistic about the future. 

  

"We must learn to appreciate life even if it is not as perfect as we want it to be; contentment is not the fulfillment of what we wish for but an appreciation of what we are already blessed with.  Let us remember that not everyone is given the chance to grow old"

Note: Thank you to my husband Jim, for all his positive input to complete this blog. 

Look Over The Fence And See Our Backyard

Welcome to our edible backyard garden!  Come this way, here's the entrance.  

Here's the view from the garden looking towards the opposite side.  We have a ledge on the left made of sturdy narra. Beyond that is an alternate table we use when it is raining and we still want to stay outdoors. 

This is our outdoor kitchen found on the right side when we face out from the yard. 

Now, here's the latest on our edible backyard garden. 

Whether we choose it or not, all gardens undergo transformation from time to time.  Plants grow, some bear flowers and die, leafy veggies are kept until there are good leaves; and when plants grow wild trimming or replacement is necessary.  

Landscape has specific functions and this time we believe that we made the ideal arrangement for our purpose; we now have a serene oasis for reading a book, writing my blog or just for relaxation and reflection.  At the same time we have an entertainment area to enjoy with friends and family.   

We saw the need for a bigger table so Jim had this fabricated with his specifications out of tubular wrought iron and GI sheet.  He painted the base light silver gray himself that closely matches the GI sheet.  Now it has a modern industrial appeal that has become popular in recent years.  

We chose these materials over wood even though wood is a classic favorite because they will stand up to the weather over time.  The table and the grill cover has a uniform look now.  

We had this new grill built at the far end because the former one was occupying the better part of the shade under the mango tree.  This opened up the shaded area to accommodate a bigger table that could sit 8-10 people comfortably.  

We tore down this old grill, look how it used to dominate the space of the shaded area. 

On the other end of the table is a sturdy wooden ledge made of a hard wood that is kamagong that my brother-in-law left with us when he and his family migrated to Vancouver.  It now serves as a buffet table or extra seating.  

See those heavy wooden bar stools?  My brother-in-law also left us 5 of them, we can always pull them out to accommodate more guests.

See the lighted area behind the ledge?  That's our outdoor kitchen. 

Opposite the seating area is the storage shed which my granddaughter calls the "tiny house"  

This is the entrance to the shed.

I had fun putting together these personalized garden decor to make it truly our own.   

Notice that the okra has grown very tall, it is almost reaching up to the shed window.  These okra give us 5-8 fruits everyday to steam for our meal.

Jim's cherry tomatoes are starting to bear fruits and not before long the bunches of fruits will ripen. 

These two plots are full of kailan and partly okra. 

Jim suggested we put the potted lemons and kalamansi in a row to create a semblance of a "wall" between the plots and paved eating area.  

Jim takes a greater role in our front lawn and backyard garden because he enjoys gardening and he has the greener thumb.   He plants and takes special care of the veggies that are bringing food to our table.  Isn't he great? 

We're lucky that we can grow a few lemon fruits, I only regret that oftentimes lots of flowers bloom but they fall, I am happy though with the kalamansi that can hold its flowers until they become fruits.  

We hope that the string beans recently sowed by our bedroom wall will grow robust even if they get less sun.  These replaced the Ceylon spinach that grew so wild, it's tops were going every which way, it was so unruly. 

That's all folks!

We are happy with the turn out of this backyard and we take pleasure staying there most of the time.  This maybe just an ordinary garden but it is our pride and joy.