7 TIPS TO ENJOY SOCIAL MEDIA WITHOUT NEED TO DETOX

Many blogs and  books have  been written about the negative impact of social media.  They believe that it is often necessary to detox.

But I believe otherwise.  If we maintain a stable and disciplined mindset, we don’t need such detox.  This is what  I do to enjoy social media. 

1- 

Choose only one platform; I chose Facebook and maintain just that.  In so doing, we don’t spend time scrolling from one platform to the other. 

2- 

Keep only a reasonable number of friends; those who are really great friends that you know personally and proved to be good for you; those that you totally trust; those who cheer along during your triumphs and pull you up when you’re down.  It  is always good to catch up with them  if getting together is not possible.  That way you can still connect..

3- 

Avoid joining groups if they are not useful to you and  if there is nothing to be learned from seeing their posts.  Definitely keep a group of your clan/family if there is one.  Consider also a group within the community to keep you updated on common concerns.  

Sometime ago, my sister included me in a cooking community.  While it was great to learn cooking skills from professional chefs, keeping up with postings to match their’s is tiresome.  I coped but it consumed a lot of my time. 

Moreover, there were so many  people in the group that  I don’t know personally.   I became wary that they could access my posts  and other personal details.  I left the group. 

A close friend invited me to join a home-and-garden group.  Initially, I was just looking at their posts.  I didn’t even feel posting anything of my garden or home because most of their  posts  are magazine worthy.  Not that I’m not proud of my garden which is quite unique to my taste but may look mediocre to others.  I left the group. 

4- 

Avoid posting every detail of  your life.   For your safety, avoid posting personal details; refrain posting your every move and activity; your schedule and where you are going.

5- 

Do not feel obliged to post something everyday; and only when you have a post-worthy item to share.  Keep in mind that it is futile to greet your partner happy birthday or anniversary if he doesn’t have a Facebook account. 

6- 

Keep a mindset not to compare yourself with others.  Always feel grateful and happy for who you are and what you have.  If not, this is when feelings of insecurity and anxiety start. 

You will see posts that will make you insecure, envious, jealous and feel left out.  Just remember that you only see that fraction of their lives.  Know that at every point, no one is excepted from coping with a difficult life.   So take hold of yourself; don’t let them affect you in a bad way . 

Understand these scenarios that may possibly affect you. 

—You  see posts of a family always eating in high end restaurants and you ask yourself when was the last time you dined there? 

What you don’t know is that maybe the  family is living beyond their means; their credit card is always in the red and are worried how to pay next month’s bill. 

—You see a wife often post Michelin-star-quality meals.   In reality, her husband expects that for dinner everyday.  She feels it’s drudgery and is often tired.

—Someone keeps posting fabulous parties she attends, all  dressed up in glamorous gowns.   Then you say: I wish I can go to such parties too and you feel left out.  What you don’t know is that she hates parties but for one reason or another she needed to go; but she’d rather relax at home with a good book. 

7- 

Establish a time to open your social media account and stick to that.  Discipline yourself so as  not to interfere with your work schedule or doing housework.  Remember that everything excessive is not good, so let’s not overdo social media.  

I’ve been on Facebook for more than a decade and I never felt needing a detox.  In fact, I look forward to the time I’ve set to scroll my newsfeed. 

I’ve reconnected with town mates; with relatives and friends who now live abroad.  We enjoy relieving interesting memories of the past and sharing how we are coming along. 

Everything is great, no need for detox. 

STEPPING BACK FROM THE WHIRLDWIND OF LIFE

The pandemic turned our lives to slow living.  

No going out except for necessities.  No dining out, no parties, no chilling at cafes, no strolling in malls and no travel.  No spa as well and no mani-pedi in saloons; not even for a trim.  In other words; just stay home. 

What is slow living?

It is a life approach where we elevate the quality of life by slowing down daily activities to give way doing more important things.  

It is creating a good balance in all aspects of our lives.   

It is also a lovely change of pace when we realize that we have been doing so many things, get so overwhelmed yet find something is missing.  

It doesn’t mean we have to do things slowly, like taking too long to make tea. 

Some say : declutter, be a minimalist if you wish ; cook simple meals, turn off the noise; minimize  social media time.  

Someone said:  “stepping back from the whirlwind of life”.

I am one person who do things fast; I walk fast and eat fast.  Slow living taught me to slow down, spend time and energy only for what’s important. To savor my food; enjoy every moment and never to be rushed or frazzled with what I need to do.  

I learned to take time to appreciate that I’m really alive and found that I want to spend time laughing, loving and living fully engaged on what matters most.

Looking back to the times my son and his family visit; he will always nag me: 

“Mom, sit down already.  We came here primarily to bond with you while we eat”.  

I have the habit of calling them to the table while I finish last-minute fixings   Now I realized that I often missed out on the fun and conversations.

I’ve learned to do things one at a time within a calculated time frame; no more multi-tasking because it causes stress.  I cook simple meals if I can; if not my husband understands and suggests takeout.  My husband and I found a rhythm in going about our chores and hobbies.  I keep our home clean and orderly but if I can’t vacuum today, that’s okay, I can do that tomorrow.

Slow living gave me time to think about my life and I’m glad that I never compare my lifestyle with others.   I am grateful for what I have.  Keeping up with the Joneses or in this modern day we say; keeping  up with the Kardashians will only cause frustrations which in the long term doesn’t matter at all.  I am happy with my own unique life.  

I realized that it is easier to accept life’s imperfections, I do not worry or overthink because life doesn’t always turn out the way we want to; sometimes they turn out better; even beyond our wildest expectations.

I think I am liking the feeling of slow living, so much so that after the pandemic, I will keep this lifestyle.  It feels liberating, it makes me breathe easier and makes life really simple.  

One great thing in slow living is I can stay right here at home, no need to go and live in the countryside, in “the little house on the prairie”.

But when the pandemic is over, I’ll still dine out with family, meet up with friends, checkout the malls, go have mani-pedi and travel to visit our children abroad. 

My garden, my sanctuary. 

WILL IT BE PINK?

Yesterday someone  wrote  that 

“Social Media Tickled Pink by Robredo’s Decision “ to run for 2022 elections.

I was already in bed, about to sleep last night when I heard my Viber notification.  I was tempted to ignore it but it maybe my daughter. So I opened my iPad. 

Lo and behold!  I saw three pictures of buildings all lit up in pink sent by my comadre. One of DLSU, Ayala mall, Cebu and St Luke’s Medical Center.  

I became curious so I opened Facebook since my daughter mentioned earlier that “ #VP LENI” was all over social media.  I was surprised to see a lot of pink indeed!   Some of my friends even changed their profile pictures with pink circles, others made their own kind of pink pictures.  

One of my closest friends, Tess also changed her profile picture showing  her at Rotterdam; wearing pink with a field of blooming pink tulips in the background

Election fever is really here in spite the pandemic.  Excitement will escalate until Election Day. 

My great memories of elections is like a fiesta. Early on Election Day, people rush to the polls then they gather outside their homes like the are celebrating. 

During my grade school days I tag along with my aunts who were teachers as they perform their election duties. I always anticipate snack time when candidates distribute packed pancit and  puto (dry noodles and native rice cake) in brown paper bags; styrofoam still non existent then. 

But elections were quite different then;  there were only Nationalita and Liberal parties.  Because of that, everyone in town can identify the leaning of every family. 

Was that better then?  Which one is more exciting, and better yet, which one favors the majority?