What Now My Life?

I read about a 94-year-old who retired from the corporate world at 60.  He regretted having done nothing more afterwards but waited for his time.  Those 34 years approximately equal a third of his lifetime. 

This made me wonder whether I'm doing the same thing.  So I asked myself, what more can I do to make a more joyful, interesting, meaningful and rewarding retirement lifestyle?

I'm turning 75 in July and if I live to be 95,  that's 20 years from now and equal to more than a fourth of my lifetime.  Shouldn't I be doing something more than just letting the days and years pass me by?  I'm not complaining though, my life is far from boring and lonely.  In fact, I'm busy as ever; but then I just feel that I could do something more. 

I've always thought that the way to go in life is more about ambition and achievement that is financially productive.  But retirement experts say that a great retirement isn't  measured by endeavors and it is not also necessary to keep up with the Joneses.

The last time my younger daughter was in town, I mentioned my sentiments about retirement.  She said that "sometimes it's not bad at all to go with the flow and see what happens".   Isn't that squandering my life to chance?

But then she told me that I need a bucket list, a board map so I could establish a reference, a basis of comparison between now and where I am going.  

"Your plan need not be something big and spectacular, you could start doing a regular exercise routine or develop a more sensible diet to maintain a healthy lifestyle".   Well, that makes sense,  if I put my health and wellness first. 

Looking back to 15 years ago after my retirement I believe that I did fairly well.  Those intervening years from 60 to today didn't go for naught.  I devoted a good part of my time managing our convenience store.  That made my transition easier since  I was occupied and able to use my management skills. 

Moreover, that was the time my granddaughter, our first grandchild was born.  I saw her every other day until she started kindergarten.  Nowadays, I see her once a week but our connection was established because I was a big part of her growing up years. 

For the last 4 years, I focused on settling in the new home and started gardening along with my husband.   It is a fascinating and exciting experience to see our plants grow, bear flowers and fruits; moreover it is rewarding to cook veggies directly from the garden to the kitchen. 

Now that I closed the store and my 14-year-old  granddaughter is in school 5 days a week, I feel that I have too much time at my disposal.  I feel like I should be doing something more. But what to do?????

Some say that if you are looking for something, read a book. So I searched on line what retirees do to while away time.  I found more than a hundred and one ways .  Most common are:  socialize more, volunteer work,  develop a hobby, do gardening, travel, write a memoir or a book, open a business, babysit, connect closer with family, reconnect with long-time friends, join a book club, teach and read a lot or choose from the above.  

"Do anything that will make you happy", 

 retirement planners say.  "But there is  a major rule for a perfect retirement balance", they further warned.  There is no way a retired person can be happy if he is not financially secure.  There is a need to suit lifestyle with financial capacity.  If a retiree can't financially support his lifestyle, it would be stressful and may cause illness. 

And so it dawned on me that I'm doing great after all. 

I had a business which I closed, 

I babysat, 

I read a lot,  

I FaceTime with my children and 5-year-old grandson weekly, 

I travel at least once a year, 

I garden,

I crochet,

I walk 4-5 kilometers a day, 

I always aim to prepare healthy meals,

I blog 

and

I'm happy. 

I therefore conclude that retirement life is how we want it to be.  In the end it will boil down to the choices we make.  

THE EYES ARE TRULY MADE FOR SEEING

Dr Jamie, my neuro ophthalmologist, one of only 30 specialists in her field in the Philippines gave me a thumbs up today, she cleared my recent eye problem. 

Ye Hey! I can drive again!

In mid-November last year, I saw everything double and linear objects slopped at the ends when both eyes were open. That's when I saw an ophthalmologist who confirmed nothing clinically wrong with both my eyes but referred me to Dr. Jamie who explored further.

After some tests, Dr Jamie said the nerve in my left eye experienced some kind of an attack, hence it doesn't synchronize with the other.  

"The deviation is not extreme, so I'm hoping your condition will go back to normal in 3-4 months", she said.  

She prescribed meds and the use of an eye patch alternating both eyes.   I have to manage my sugar and cholesterol intake as these may have triggered my condition. 

I was really worried. What if my eyes won't go back to normal?  What if it will get worse?   It was a big inconvenience that I couldn't drive and cross a busy street on my own.  When I was driven down the road, cars looked like there were two of each; when we turned a corner, it looked like we just missed bumping cars. Things looked normal up close with my patch on, though my peripheral view was limited to less than 90 degrees.  

My children did not want to wait 3 months, they wanted to know what's wrong straight away.  So I underwent an MRI and  to our great relief,  results  proved nothing wrong with the brain and everything connected to the eye. 

As I waited for my eyes to heal, my older daughter, our only child who lives in town came to the rescue. She patiently drove me around; to the supermarket, the drugstore, the bank and my doctor's appointments.  

The good part about it is that I enjoyed bonding with her especially when we hung out in the coffee shop while waiting for appointments. This also gave me a glimpse of how my life will be when I'll grow much older and more helpless in the future. 

She immediately ordered an eye patch online since my doctor ran out of her stock and the item is not available anywhere. For a week I wore one that my husband improvised out of a face mask. Eventually we got the ordered one and then my younger daughter abroad also sent me a pair for both the left and right eyes.  

I found out that there are a lot of good and compassionate people out there.  Strangers helped me navigate the few steps up and down the church.  My acquaintances in the neighborhood wanted to know what's wrong and how I'm getting along and offered to accompany me to where I was going in case I can't go alone. 

Most of all, I have a support group of people closest to me: my immediate family.   My son said:

 " I'm praying very hard for your recovery Mom and I'm happy you are taking this matter with optimism". I replied that I have faith.  I'm sure, both my daughters equally prayed hard for me as well. 

My son's in-laws were concerned and consoled me; a dear friend also volunteered to bring me to the doctor and do errands; my older daughter's in laws have devotedly prayed for me; her mother-in law, the Hijas de Jesus congregation of nuns, one of them being my daughter's sister-in-law; a candle was lighted for my recovery in Fatima, Portugal by another sister-in law. 

But more than these enormous help, I had unwavering faith that I will get healed.  I also prayed very hard and made special devotions.  I pleaded for the compassion and intercession of Our Mother of Perpetual Help who never failed me.  I offered everything:  my work, joys, sacrifices, sufferings and frustrations everyday to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and for the healing of the sick. 

After this experience, my heart goes to all the blind people; life must truly be hard for them.  Imagine the frustration of those who wasn't born blind and are learning to live another kind of life again. 

I can't say that I am a very religious person but I am devoted to my religious faith.  So whenever I am helplessly dealt with challenges like my eye condition, I don't despair.  I've always accepted life's challenges with resignation because I know there is only One who can help me best, our Creator Who does not abandon us and has plans for all of us.